The Invisible Tourist: #1: Chances Are in Nebraska...

 

This past Memorial Day weekend, I was honored to attend the memorial and internment of my partner's father in Geneva, Nebraska. (No, I'd never heard of it either.) Due to the small size of the town, the closest town for a large family celebration of life dinner party was in York, Nebraska, about 20 miles away. (No, I'd never heard of here either.) Don't be fooled, in spite of it being significantly larger than Geneva, York is SMALL.(Just over 8,000) But the local dining star
is well known, a restaurant called Chances R. 

The entire family of siblings and children remembered this establishment as the place for special dinners going back at least 20 years. (I googled it and it was opened in 1932.) It was the perfect place to gather and remember a life well lived. 

Except...

-Most of the guests are now established "City Dwelling Folk". 

-Most of the guests are over 60. (Some well so.)

-Chances R is no different from any other restaurant or service business recovering from the pandemic. Struggles include staffing issues among a host of others. 

-It is Memorial Day weekend and Graduation weekend for local schools and Chances R is the only game in town. (Unless you count the Applebees inside the Best Western out on the highway.)

When we arrived for our reservation (we'd booked an entire room) at 6:30pm on Saturday night, Chances R was booming with business. And. They were out of their featured and most famous menu item: the prime rib. ( As well as several other cuts of steak.) Our waitress, who I am sure had nothing to do with the supply shortage, was overwhelmed and as I recall from my disastrously short-lived table waiting days: IN THE WEEDS. 

Think back...remember that service job you had in High School, or college, or adulthood? Remember the times when things were out of your control and just not going well? Our poor server was in the thick of one of those shifts; and on the busiest weekend of the summer. I saw that look in her eyes as she apologized after each exasperated groan when she had to inform each diner, "We're out of that." 

Now the point of this entire trip was to come and pay tribute to a strong, wonderful man who lived a long life and saw a lot of hardships coming through it. I'll admit my guilt in smirking a bit a the Applebees in the Best Western. I'll admit to my patronizing reaction in finding that the Walmart in York was the only place to get a leather belt, a beard trim (for my partner) and some groceries. I'm one of those city folks that pride myself on "shopping small" or "supporting local". But that attitude of superiority leaves a stain behind on lovely people who happen to be living their lovely lives in a small place. (Not to mention that it's just plain obnoxious no matter where you live.)  I don't want to be responsible for that stain. I certainly didn't for this poor waitress. (My mind flew painfully back to the 5 dropped chicken fried steak dinners of my early 20's.  A busy Cheddars restaurant; five expectant and hungry diners sitting up in anticipation of a delicious warm meal. The look on all faces as the entire loaded tray crashed to the floor in a symphony of breakage and white cream gravy...It wasn't pretty.) 

And the man we were honoring certainly would have been gracious. He was class itself; having lived through the Dust Bowl, the Depression, served in the Air Force during the Korean War to build a life and family and legacy of which to be proud. It is what brought so many together in this place. He'd had the same small upbringing, but rather than chafe at the limitations, he thrived. He became appreciative of all he had. He became creative in finding solutions. He became imaginative rather than entitled. With no intentional thought he lived a life of "being the change we wish to see in the world".  (Ghandi)

I breathed deeply. I could be the change. We all could. Someone just needed to start. I looked directly at the waitress and smiled. I changed my order to a cut of steak that was available, I told her that it would be absolutely fine. And just like that, the others at the table did the same. While we waited, we ordered more wine and the memories and stories flowed along with laughter and tears. When the food came out, it was delicious, perfectly cooked and savored by all. 

Everyone thanked the waitress upon leaving with smiles and gratitude. Chances R had done what it was supposed to do for this gathering. It brought us together in community and thankfulness. It spurred happy tales and future memories to add to the past. As opposed to leaving no trace, we ended up leaving a little  something after all:

Grace.

We are all the better for it. And, chances are,,you know where to find me dining the next time I'm up in York, Nebraska. After all, it was a lovely drive.